Skip to Content

Why I Said NO to a Name Change After Marriage

Name change after marriage

Independent yet happily engaged at the Mycenae archaeological site in Greece.

Women, it is an option to keep your last name…

“Have a good summer, Ms. Marshall!” my students hollered as they poured out of the class and into the sweaty summer hallway. One boy, Aiden, stopped short at the door. “Wait,” he gasped happily, “next year you’ll be Mrs. Whatever-Your-Husband’s-Name-Is, not Ms. Marshall, right?”

“NOOO!!” I shrieked, face flushed with emotion.

Poor Aiden nearly dropped his bright red backpack. “But you’re getting married, aren’t you?” he asked, befuddled.

“Yes,” I bellowed, “but I am NOT changing my name!” My sweet seventh grade student looked shocked.

The ancient, vibrant colors of the temple at Mycenae, Greece have been lost... like a woman's name can get lost when she marries and takes another name!

The ancient, vibrant colors of the temple at Mycenae, Greece have been lost… like a woman’s identity can get lost when she marries and takes another name.

“That’s possible?” he gulped.

YES, humans of the world, a woman does NOT have to change her name when she gets married.

In my case, there are several strong reasons why, even though I adore my fiance, I am keeping my name.

Here’s why:

1. I don’t feel like changing my name.

Feminism is about choice, and I choose to spend my time doing things like, you know, making a speech with the Mayor of Boston, or writing 800 more articles, or uniting Education Bloggers to transform teaching, rather than doing weeks of paperwork to erase my former identity.

This map shows Mycenae, Greece (circa 1900 – 1100 BC). Only a few walls are left. What is left of the online empire of a businesswoman who changes her name?

This map shows Mycenae, Greece, circa 1900–1100 BC. Only a few walls are left. What remains of the empire of a businesswoman who changes her name?

2. Altering my name would be terrible for my business.

Currently, if you Google my name you will get pages and pages of articles by and about me and my Teaching-Traveling-Writing-Speaking career. I am proud of each and every one of those articles, and have worked hours every day to build up this online empire. Should a businesswoman with an extensive online reach really throw that all away? I refuse to.

3. My partner loves and respects me, no matter what my name is.

I praise the Earth and sky for sending such a phenomenal man to be my partner: a man who not only created a rose petal scavenger hunt for our engagement, but who has also never once made me feel guilty or wrong for my choice to keep my name. THANK YOU, open-minded men of the world!

These walls in Mycenae, Greece hold history, as does my name.

These walls in Mycenae, Greece hold history, as does my name.

4. Changing my name would make me feel sad.

No matter how you slice it, the person who has to change their name gets the short end of the stick. If I were forced to do it, I would feel insulted, disrespected, and depressed. Instead, my partner and I will create a loving, wonderful family based on equality, communication, and mutual respect. And that makes me happy!

So what are YOUR thoughts after reading this article? If you changed your name or plan to change it, what are your reasons? If you kept your own name or did a creative name merge, tell us why, and how it went!

Click here for more photos and articles from our Greece teacher tour of historic sites. For our two secrets on how to save money on a wedding, click here!

Making a very serious face to honor the sandwiches burned by toasters.
The Funniest Signs on Cape Cod, Thanks to Sandwich, MA
← Read Last Post
The ribbon-cutting for the New Boston Hostel with the Mayor!
My Speech With the Mayor at the Boston Hostel Opening
Read Next Post →

 

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.